Does Couples Therapy Work? The top 5 things to consider.
The short answer is, “yes, it works,” most of the time. Research indicates that about 3 out of every 4 couples finds marital therapy or couples counseling effective. The longer answer is, “it depends.” It depends on numerous factors. The first of which is getting started. Consider Getting Started Skepticism of couples therapy, or what […]
5 Tips to Manage Anxiety
Most people have experienced anxiety to some degree, so I bet you have too. Perhaps you’ve experienced heart palpitations as you were preparing to give a presentation or speech. Perhaps you’ve felt that pit in your stomach as you began to think of possible reasons you can’t get in touch with your friend or loved-one. […]
Tips to Build Healthier Relationships for couples from a Couples Therapist
Relationships can be challenging. Relationships can also add to our quality of life and mental health. When we work to make our relationships healthy, we increase the chances that our relationships will add to, not take away from, our life enjoyment and fulfillment. So, how can relationships work for us and not against us? Making […]
My Wife and My Girlfriend Are the Same Person: Nurturing Numerous Partnerships in Your Relationship
Partnerships For marriages or other long-term romantic relationships to thrive, it is important to understand the concept that there are numerous partnerships within the relationship. Even if you don’t use the term “partner” in reference to your long-term romantic relationship, successful relationships require navigating several different partnerships simultaneously. From the perspective of a couples therapist, […]
3 Listening Strategies You’ll Learn in Therapy: Part 1 of 4 Overview – Hearing Others
Often times in contemporary society we listen to respond rather than to understand. We listen until we have a rebuttal, or we listen until we have a thought we want to share. Then, we either interrupt or get distracted by our own thoughts and struggle to listen effectively. We can become so focused on wanting […]
3 Listening Strategies You’ll Learn in Therapy: Part 2 of 4 – Reflect what your partner is saying
Skill #1 – Reflect: Think of this skill as holding up a verbal mirror to the person to whom you are listening and trying to understand. When someone shares something with you, a first step is to reflect to them what you’ve heard them say. Essentially, tell them what they just told you using your […]
3 Listening Strategies You’ll Learn in Therapy: Part 3 of 4 – Be Curious
Skill #2 – Be Curious: Think of this skill as an effort to literally shift your perspective by asking questions so that you can see the issue from the same perspective as the other person to better understand where they are coming from. Consider these screenshots: If you have the view (i.e., perspective) shown in […]
3 Listening Strategies You’ll Learn in Therapy: Part 4 of 4 – Validate
Skill #3 – Validate: Think of this skill as communicating to the other person that you can imagine how their feelings could result from the situation or that you understand how they are seeing things. Validation is often one of the most misunderstood or difficult skills for people to learn in the context of relationship […]
How Do I Find the Right Therapist for Me?
More importantly, how do you find the right therapist for you? While there are general things for anyone to consider when finding a therapist, such as location, cost, and whether the clinician is licensed or not, there are several factors to consider that might be specific to you. Whether you are searching for individual therapy […]
Learning to “Control” Emotions
Humans…we’re complex, confusing, and interesting creatures. And one of the most fascinating aspects of the human experience, in my opinion, is emotion. Whether you like having emotions or not is irrelevant. Emotions are a part of being human, and rather than trying to “control” or avoid our emotions, the key is to learn how to […]